Anonymous

I think this is the second time I am writing about this.  I know somewhere within my alter-ego psyche, I want to be celebrated, I want people to acknowledge who and what I am, but, my ego, does not agree.  I love the idea of being perceived as an underdog, a nobody.  That gives me room to manoeuvre. 

I also think it was also the reason why Away* was away.  I enjoy talking, I enjoy dropping my 2cents on anything that I find interesting to talk about, but it does not mean I enjoy the sound of my own voice.  I have in the past recorded it, I think I sound more silly and with a deeper voice than what I imagine I sound like.

For as long as I can remember my mother has constantly said to me, Lebogang, you would make a good politician.  I have refused that path, and still do.  I do not think I have the language capability to politic, I can argue, but arguments don't really win you an election, they might influence it.

So where am I going with this.  Well, being anonymous is dope, its very dope especially if you are at the same time doing some good shit on the underground, below radar.  But, once in while, or rather at some point you become mainstream, not of your doing but because people end up loving what you do.

I don't mean to brag (well, I suppose starting a sentence like that means, I am actually bragging about something.  It's like that phrase, "honestly speaking...", I mean, hell who want to listen to somebody who sometimes is honest, that means in most cases they are lying, any I digress...), but my name keeps coming up when I don't expect it to, and I get surprised and reject what ever it is they are giving me accolades for.

Like yesterday a friend of mine I had not seen in about 6 months, says to me, "Yo, your photographs on Studio 83 are dope son!".  Here is the thing, he has never been to SinahNtholiNkoane, that surprised me. I don't even market any of these two sites, Away* and SinahNtholiNkoane, at all.  In fact if I was to meet you somewhere, and you knew I ran SinahNtholiNkoane , you would have to bring it up, I never bring SinahNtholiNkoane up, not even the closest friends of mine (all nine of them), don't visit SinahNtholiNkoane that regularly, except for Matome for obvious reasons.

Are you following what I am saying?

I think I lost myself.  Alas, to explain why Away* was away, was because I am/was not sure if I want this to be like SinahNtholiNkoane .  I do not thrive on 'being celebrated'.

Alas, I just finish my first lecture for today.  New students, new minds, new ideas, a new take on life.  That is what I love about teaching.  You know that cliché about, "... the teacher never teaches anything, but learns from his/her students." It is true, but, yes the teacher teaches, but he learns more from the students, that what each student individually learns from that teacher.

Now, about revolt.  It will continue.  I just have to drop that silly thing called wordpress.  I have also removed it from the Gusto-Projects main page, I will only bring it back, once, it is ready to be read.

Alas, I gotta continue work on Half.  Till the next double-click.

Word.